Author: Nancy
Disclaimer: Don't own JAG or characters. This is for entertainment
only. Quotes are from "To Kill A Mockingbird" by Harper Lee.
Classification: Drama Harm but other characters are present
Rating: PG
Summary: Harm finds himself the target of an old enemy. Once again
Harm is the pawn and placed in an uncontrollable situation. I hope
you will find compassion in the characters I use later on. This
occurs during season 6. Mic is still around.
A special thanks to Barb and Carolyn for beta reading!
PART 2
The emergency room staff worked quickly to establish an airway and continued to provide ventilation into Harm's severely depressed respiratory system.
"Get ABG's, chem profile and a tox screen stat." One of the emergency room physicians yelled and continued to analyze possible causes of his patient's condition. "Hell, his vitals make me think overdose." He said to the team that worked feverishly to restore their patient's breathing.
"Chest Xray shows some infiltrates consistent with the smoke inhalation, but that doesn't explain his vitals. Everything is depressed. His O2 sat is 85. His temperature is subnormal and his BP is 50 systolic no diastolic, pulse is 38. He is going to crash if we don't get an answer from the lab soon. Make the IV Lactated Ringers wide open and give 25 mcg of Dopamine IV. Better give him some Narcan just in case."
"Looks more like barbiturate overdose to me. Look at the reflexes." Another doctor added as he tapped certain points on Harm's arm and leg.
"Change that order to Flumazenil 0.2mg IV push. Repeat a dose of 0.3mg in 30 seconds and repeat 0.5mg until we get his vitals up. Put in a NG tube and connect to low, continous suction. Save the aspirate and send it to the lab."
"Vital signs improving. BP 70 systolic 30 diastolic, pulse 44. Oxygen sat is 89."
"Give another 25mcg of Dopamine and repeat the Flumazenil at 0.5mg to a max of 3mg. What are his vitals?"
"BP 80/40, pulse is 48 and regular. Oxygen sat is 91."
"Let's move him to ICU and leave him on the ventilator until he's alert. Call Dr. Parkman for follow up. Has anyone been notified?"
"The police called the emergency numbers in his wallet."
"Dr. Parkman is going to need a history. The guy is military."
***********
Admiral Chegwidden paced in the ICU waiting room after asking the nursing staff repeatedly if he could speak with someone about Harm Rabb's condition. Repeatedly he was given the same answer; "Dr. Parkman is with Mr. Rabb now. He is looking at the results of his tests and will be out shortly to speak with you."
AJ had just retired for the night when he received the call. It took him all of 20 minutes to arrive at the hospital after obtaining sketchy information about a fire in Harm's apartment.
"Mr. Chegwidden?" The man wore a white lab jacket and stethoscope draped around his neck. He extended his hand and introduced himself, "Dr. Parkman, I'm the pulmonary specialist treating Mr. Rabb. I understand you are listed as his emergency contact."
"Admiral AJ Chegwidden, Judge Advocate for the Navy. Commander Rabb is one of my people. What the hell is going on?"
"Let's go over here and sit down." The doctor hated to give this news to his patient's boss. As they settled into the chairs, Parkman began to explain "Commander Rabb is being treated for smoke inhalation from the fire in his apartment. We found high levels of secobarbital in his bloodstream and in the contents of his stomach. He apparently overdosed."
"You mean he was drugged?" The Admiral frowned.
"Whether it was self induced or accidental which I find hard to believe is yet to be determined. Has Commander Rabb had any history of depression or drug abuse?"
"Wait a minute. You think he may have done this to himself?" The Admiral felt his anger rising.
"Is there any reason to believe otherwise? From what the police shared, there was no evidence of break in, and one of the firemen found these." The doctor handed the Admiral a bottle with small white pills. It's Seconal, a barbiturate that is given by prescription only. There was no label, but our lab and pharmacy identified the pills. They were discovered in the area where Commander Rabb was found. By the blood levels he must have ingested enough to put an elephant under. If it hadn't been for the call about the fire alerting the fire department, he wouldn't have made it." The doctor said somberly.
The Admiral stared wordlessly at the bottle finding this all hard to believe.
"I realize Commander Rabb will need to be transferred to Bethesda as soon as he is stable, but I recommend a psychiatric consult as soon as he regains consciousness. If you would like to see him, I will walk you to his room. He's still receiving ventilatory assistance, but as soon as he's alert we'll discontinue it."
The Admiral frowned with concern as he followed the physician into the cubicle. Harm lay in a deep sleep, a tube in his mouth pumping oxygen at a steady rhythm into his lungs, an IV dripped a clear liquid into his vein, and a monitor continuously displayed an EKG pattern and VS on its screen.
The doctor quietly exited leaving the worried man with the patient. "Harm, what in the hell happened?" The Admiral spoke softly and sat down in a chair near the bedside.
*********
The Admiral stayed all night in the waiting room, checking on Harm for ten minutes on each hour. He would call Harm's parents in the morning. Maybe by morning Harm would wake up and explain what happened.
Harm woke up late the next afternoon quite confused and managed to pull out his IV before the nurses intervened.
Trish and Frank Burnett had arrived earlier in the afternoon and sat in the waiting room after visiting at Harm's bedside. Trish was as surprised as the Admiral was when she was told of the doctor's suspicions. Bud and Mac had come by after being informed discreetly about the incident. The Admiral chose not to share all the doctor's findings. "Have either of you noticed anything unusual about Harm's behavior lately? Has he been upset about anything?"
Mac and Bud exchanged questioning looks as both stated he just seemed to be a little irritable.
************
Harm felt groggy and unable to think clearly. His throat and chest hurt. The doctor had discontinued the airway and ventilator and replaced it with supplemental oxygen by nasal cannula. He tried to fight the desire to sleep, but his eyes felt so heavy, with his last thought before drifting off 'Why am I so tired.'
He awoke for a second time a couple of hours later to the soft touch on his forehead. When he drowsily opened his eyes he realized his mother was speaking to him.
"Mom, what are you doing here?"
"I've been waiting for you to wake up." She tried to smile but wasn't very successful. "Harm, I wish you would have called." Tears glazed her eyes as she bent over and kissed him on the cheek.
"Was I suppose to call?" Harm's mind still felt dull and confused.
"Yes, you know I'll always listen." She continued to stroke his hair gently.
"I'm sorry Mom, none of this makes sense." Harm tried to remember if he had said or done something to upset his mom.
"Just remember I'm always there for you darling." Trish looked lovingly at her grown son.
"I know." Harm felt his eyes growing heavy again and surrendered again to his urge to sleep.
"We will be able to transfer him to Bethesda in the morning. His vital signs are much stronger, but the doctors at Bethesda are still going to want to watch his lungs to make sure further complications from the smoke inhalation don't arise. I've already arranged for a psychiatric consult." Dr. Parkman reported to Trish as she left Harm sleeping.
*********
The next morning Harm was able to think more clearly and began to ask questions.
Dr. Parkman explained that he would be transferred to Bethesda for follow up and that the doctors there would be better able to explain his treatment. Harm thought the man seemed somewhat evasive and before he could ask more questions Parkman retreated from the room. 'I don't remember a fire. I just want to know what happened.' frustrated, Harm leaned back into the pillow.
His mother appeared almost immediately with the transporters. She wore her 'I'm being cheerful for Harm's sake' expression that he had learned long ago to recognize whenever his mom was worried, but wanted to hide her feelings from him. He decided he was not going to get answers from her, not now anyway.
***********
Mac and Bud stood in the doorway of the burned out apartment. Mac stepped cautiously through the room. The fire department had already determined the cause was the result of a kitchen fire. Harm had been cooking something, and it blazed up and eventually spread. The firemen had managed to save a few things. Harm's briefcase and laptop were on his desk away from the primary sight of the fire, but most everything else was either burned or so smoke damaged it couldn't be salvaged.
"The laptop is fried, but the Commander's briefcase appears okay." Bud examined the case and opened it to check the contents.
"Harm is not this careless." Mac said absently.
"Why do you suppose the Admiral was asking all those questions." Bud looked uneasily at Mac. "You don't think that...I mean the Admiral asked if the Commander had been upset about anything."
Mac bent down and found a broken picture frame. She pulled out the slightly burned picture. It was the picture taken at AJ Robert's christening. Everyone was smiling as Mac held AJ and Harm draped his arm around her shoulder looking down at the infant. Bud and Harriet were standing on each side beaming with pride.
"That was a special day." Bud said quietly.
"Oh, I'm sorry Bud. I wasn't even thinking." Mac looked sympathetically at Bud.
"I wish we would have had a picture like this with little Sarah." Bud swallowed heavily. "Commander Rabb hasn't been himself lately. I guess none of us have. You know he gave little AJ that yellow model Steerman he had in his office."
"Bud, he loved that model. I want to say that some of his flying buddies gave it to him after he finished restoring Sarah." Mac was surprised that Harm gave up one of his most prized possessions
"I tried to get him to keep it because I knew it was special, but he said he wanted AJ to have it. Maybe it would inspire him to want to fly one day." Bud went on to explain.
Bud then accidently dropped the briefcase spilling the contents on the floor. Mac helped him collect the files and placed them back into the case.
"What's this." Bud held a type written letter and began to read.
"I think you need to see this." He said with a frown on his face.
Mac began to scan the letter, "...I'm tired and don't think I can handle all of this anymore...Harm"
Her hand began to tremble as she carefully folded the letter and placed it in her pocket.
**************
Later that evening Mac sat alone in her apartment curled up on her sofa. She didn't realize she had not turned on any lights. Mic had used his key to let himself in, at first thinking maybe Mac was asleep, he quietly lay his coat and keys down before spotting her.
"Sarah, I thought you were asleep in the bedroom." He sat down and placed his arm around her. When she didn't respond immediately he touched her lightly on the cheek, "Sarah, what's wrong?"
"I want to postpone the wedding." She said softly.
"Tell me what's happened?" Mic turned her so she faced him. "You've been crying."
"You're not going to like this, but I can't help it."
"I'm listening."
"Harm's apartment burned last night. He was almost killed." Her gaze turned down to avoid seeing his expression.
"Is he going to be all right?" Mic asked gently.
"I don't know." Mac knew physically Harm was going to recover, but from the Admiral's actions, Mac knew that he suspected that Harm was somehow responsible for what happened. The Admiral had not demanded a more thorough investigation and had asked those questions regarding Harm's mood. Even Harm's mother who normally took everything with great strength seemed worried. But most of all the letter brought tears to her eyes again.
Harm had always tried to be there when she needed him most, and she had always tried to be there for him. But he never came to her anymore. Maybe he needed her more than ever now. Tears began to fall as she lay her head on Mic's shoulder. Tomorrow she would talk with the Admiral.
Mic rubbed her back and rocked her gently not fully understanding the reason for her concern.
"I've waited this long. I can wait until you're ready." He said trying to hide his disappointment. 'Is she ever going to let him go,' he thought bitterly.
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